She's Gone
by Fangirling It 7
Summary: The people in the Bunker find out about what happened to the those who went into space. Abby finds out about Clarke
1. Chapter 1

"What if Clarke is dead, Marcus? It's been six years, we could have survived on the ground a year ago, but we haven't been able to dig our way out yet. They went to the ring. What if they never made it? What if they did and they think we are dead? Marcus, what if my little girl thinks I'm dead?" Abby says to me as we settle down in our seats in Octavia's office.

"Abby, we can't think like that," I say. Abby's worry is familiar one, but with each passing day of the extra year down here; her fears have only increased. I place a hand on her knee and hope she finds some comfort in my touch.

"They have been digging for a year, Marcus. There doesn't seem to be any end to it. What if they have tried to make contact? What if she thinks I'm dead? I can't do that to her again, Marcus. Raven said there wasn't enough fuel to get back down." Abby continues as if I hadn't spoken. She jumps from one fear to the next without pausing.

I am about to try and calm Abby again, but Gaia and Indra enter before Octavia does. Abby and I both stand as Octavia enters; she has really become a leader in her own right. In some ways Octavia has become twice the leader any of us ever have been. Indra was right; she has learned from everyone. From Bellamy, she uses her heart. From Clarke, an unwavering belief that there is way to a solution. From Indra, she become a warrior. Unfortunately, from Thelonious and me, she has seemed to learn from the Ark, that if certain rules aren't followed there is to be an execution. Luckily, she has changed what is a capital offense. People in the bunker aren't executed for everything; only for killing another person and there was one warrior that had tried to force people into fighting him. She has strict rules for food, but refuses to kill for that; any thief must fast for the meals they stole then they have double the workload after their fasting. Perhaps, Octavia is proof that the next generation will do better.

Octavia sits behind the desk and looks over to Gia, since it was she who called for this meeting, "We have made it through the rubble, Heda." Gaia says.

"Has anyone been out yet?" Octavia asks.  
"Yes, Jaha from Skaikru, he wanted to… check the air? We are awaiting your word for the first group to go." Gaia replies. Even after all the teaching we have done about radation, Gaia and most of the Grounders seem still be confused by most of the science behind Priamfaya.

"For the first group out of this, I want someone from Skiakru to continue to monitor the radiation levels. Just because the air was fine for the few minutes Jaha was out this bunker doesn't mean it'll stay that way. I don't want anyone to be exposed to a radation level that will kill them if it isn't safe after prolonged exposure. I know those on the digging crew were likely exposed, but the protocol that Dr. Griffin as instituted by testing every worker, should keep them protected." Octavia states. There is a knock at the door, "Enter."

"Dr. Griffin," one of Octavia's gaurds says and hands Abby a tablet.

"According to Thelonious' findings, the radation level on the surface is in a safe enough range that we would all be okay. These first tests from those directly in contact with the air shows that they are fine, no adverse effects. Though it's only been fifteen or so minutes, based on these results I would recommend a small group and those in the group be monitored before we allow the rest of the bunker to leave." Abby says.

"Mount Weather's logs showed that if they were given our blood they were fine for a while before they would show symptoms," I say vaguely recalling going through the logs for Mount Weather's treatment protocols. I felt more than saw Indra and Gaia tense at the mention of Mount Weather.

"Yes, that's true. Which is why if we were patient and waited twenty- four to forty-eight hours to monitor the group who broke the surface we would know for sure. But, it's been a long six years and we should look to see what is left. I would recommend small groups, with no essential personnel." Abby finishes.

"Indra?" Octavia prompts. It is rare to see Octavia make a decision without the consult of everyone in the room.

"I understand very little of the science, but we must make sure it is safe for our people to return. I agree with Abby, we should send a team sooner rather than later. We should go now, assuming that we have enough medicine for the effects of the radation." Indra says.

Everyone looks to Abby, "We have enough for twenty- maybe twenty-five serious cases, and the exposure would be immediate and we will be able to treat as soon as symptoms appear."

Octavia sits back in her chair and thinks for a minute and I am again reminded that she is no longer a reactionary warrior, but a leader. She waits a long while before she speaks, "I will be among the first to go."

"I strongly advise against that," I say, "The people in this bunker follow you, and we can't risk losing you. Another conclave wouldn't be in our best interest especially if we are going to be in the bunker."

"If the levels are safe, then I have nothing to worry about. I will not send people to the surface as a test if I am not willing to go as well." Octavia counters.

"I want to be on the first team out as well," Abby says affectively ending my pleas for Octavia to change her mind. I turn to Abby, but after seeing the look her face I know I won't be able to convince her to stay either.

"I would expect nothing less." Octavia answers, "I would like to leave in half an hour, would that provide a more concrete idea about what the air on the surface will do to us?" Octavia asks.

"Yes, but I would still want to monitor all of us who go now. The diggers and Thelonious were only exposed for a few minutes, we would likely be exposed for hours," Abby replies.

"I understand. Monitor those already exposed. When we return we will be monitored as well," Octavia says. With that Abby gets up and leaves the room.

"I will prepare two guards and scouts," Indra says and goes to leave the room. Gaia follows her out as well.

I get up to follow them out, "Kane." Octavia calls before I can get to the door. I turn to look at her, "I would like you to go with us as well."

"I'm not sure this that is a good idea. With you and Indra leaving someone needs to stay behind and to maintain peace within the bunker. There should be someone who isn't at risk for radation poisoning." I say.

"The ambassadors will keep their people in line, while Dr. Griffin monitor us," Octavia states evenly, "I need you for something else, something that might be more important than search the surface" I give her a questioning look, but before I can say anything she continues, "We are what is left of the human race down here. You have been cautioning me about Bellamy's survival in the ring for the last six years."

"I just don't want…"

"I know, you want me to be optimistic, but you also want me to remember that space was a Hail Mary and there are challenges up there that might have been hard, if not impossible, to overcome. Doctor Griffin has been working with the clan healers to incorporate their medicine with Skaikru's medicine, but if Clarke can't found, if Bellamy… if they didn't survive we still need Dr. Griffin. I think you would be the best person to get Dr. Griffin to understand that she is needed. That she has to continue to help the human race survive and I believe you would be the only one capable of getting her to see that."

"Octivia…" I begin.

"I don't know what it would mean to lose a daughter, but I do know that we need more than one Skaikru doctor in order to keep the human race going. And you know Abby is the best bet we have for that right now. We need Abby and Jackson working together." Octavia finishes. I look at her and I know she is right. Abby has told me that the healers from the other clans are willing to learn our ways, but that some of the healers don't have the necessary steady hands to perform surgery. Abby has talked about expanding her teaching to those who had steady hands and had some interest in learning how to save lives.

"I took her decision away from her before Priamfaya, I will empress upon her the importance of living, but I won't force her to live again." I say. I only got Abby to agree to live after we gassed everyone by reminding her that Clarke was still out there; if Clarke doesn't come back I'm not sure she'll find it within herself to keep going. For almost a year after we sealed the bunker Abby kept going with the hope that she would be reunited with Clarke again.

"I want you there to remind her of responsibility," She says, but relaxes and finishes, "but you are right we can't make someone live if they don't want to. All I want you to do is remind her that if… if Clarke is gone she would want her mother to keep helping. We both know that is what Clarke would want." Octavia says.

I turn towards the door, "I do hope they survived up there and they are just waiting for us to dig ourselves out."

"Me too," I hear Octavia whisper as I exit her office.

We make our way through the tunnels and after a few hours of making our way through the rubble and we are on the surface. I look up at the sky and am instantly reminded of when we landed with the Ark. The sun on my face and the smell of air is just as freeing as it was when we landed.

"Heda," calls a scout.

We all turn to look at the scout and we see seven people standing in the distance; they are too far away to make out who it is. I look at everyone Indra and the two guards have tightened their grip on the swords on their belts. I put my hand on the gun at my waist, but keep another on Abby. Just to make sure she doesn't make a dash for the first group of people we see in hopes of finding Clarke; having lived through Abby looking for Clarke once I am keeping my eyes on her at all times.

Indra and the two guards slowly make their way towards the new arrivals with Octavia, Abby and I following at a much slower pace. Abby is between Octavia and I because as a doctor she is needed much more than either of us are; if it came down to it we could find another leader among the ambassadors, but doctors are in short supply.

As we get closer I hear the group repeating, "We mean no harm. We come in peace." We get to the group and it's Bellamy and everyone from who went to space. They all look well, a tad underfed, but none of them look injured.

"Where's Clarke?" Abby immediately asks when we get closer to the group. I look at them again and realize that Clarke isn't with them. I look over at Abby and she is looking past Bellamy and Raven as if Clarke might be bringing up the rear, "Where is Clarke?" Abby asks again this time her voice shakes.

Bellamy and Raven look at each other; I feel dread and hoping against hope that I am wrong by what that look means. Abby's legs buckle under her next to me; I know she saw the look pass between those two. I race to catch her and hear her continually muttering, "No. She had to survive. No. Please. No."

"I'm so sorry, Abby," Raven says and she kneels in front of Abby. Raven wraps her arms around Abby in a tight hug. I keep my hand on Abby shoulder, but I don't say anything.

After a while Abby's sobs begin to soften long enough to ask, "How?"

Raven and Bellamy look at each other again before Bellamy speaks, "Before the Deathwave hit, we needed a satellite moved in order for the ring to turn on and we had a lot to do in order to be able to take off in time. Clarke went for the satellite alone and…"

"We waited as long as we could, Abby, I promise you, but when the radiation started to affect the avionics, we had to leave without her." Raven finishes.

Abby looks up at the seven who went into space, "This satellite, that Clarke went after, it was important?"

"She is the only reason we made it to the ring alive," Bellamy answers and the rest nod in agreement.

"We should move inside the bunker, the sun is setting," Indra says.

I nod in agreement and I give Abby my hand in order to help her up and we begin to walk towards the bunker. Abby and I are in the front right behind one of Octavia's guards and she is leaning heavily on me. I keep one arm wrapped tightly around her shoulders. I can hear her sniffling occasionally, I look over at her and she her wiping the tears from her eyes as they drop. Behind me, I can hear Octavia and Bellamy reuniting, they keep the voices low. Bellamy's pride at knowing Octavia not only survived, but thrived as a leader, is hard to miss. Octavia seems equally as proud of Bellamy's ability to survive in Space. Good, I think. At least most of them made it down.

"Marcus?" Abby whispers as we make our way back into the bunker. I bend my head to indicate I heard her, "She's dead, Marcus. My baby girl is dead." She sounds hollow. Her voice says more than her words. She's hollow, worse than when Jake died. Worse than when Clarke left after Mount Weather. Worse than every what if conversation we have had in the last six years. Seeing the group that went to space and came back without Clarke, her voice has lost the hope that has kept her going the last six years.

"I know," I say because there isn't anything else to say. Not now.


	2. Chapter 2

For the next month Abby worked in the hospital in the bunker until she was too tired to continue working; then she would come to bed, but she kept her distance in bed. She never really ventured out of the bunker to the surface unless someone was injured during the reconstruction and hunting parties. During the meetings with Octavia, the ambassadors, Bellamy and Raven, she didn't speak unless spoken to. When Abby is asked a question in the meetings I am more than a little surprised she is able answer the question asked. Her gaze seems so far away that I would have thought she hadn't heard a word said during the meetings.

Today we are discussing a timetable for making the transition from the bunker to the surface permanent. A lot of people with young children have decided to spend nights inside the bunker and a lot of people like having the reliable meals that we are still being provided for by the bunker. So far, the ambassadors have agreed to keep the peace on the surface that we have had in the bunker so for now all pre-Priamfaya grudges are, for the most part, in the past.

As the current meeting is ending a guard that usually stands outside the door knocks and enters and says, "Pardon the interruption, Heda, but scouts have found two survivors on the surface. One of the survivors was injured when the scouts tried to take them by force. She also managed to wound the scout." Everyone in the room sits up a little straighter at the guard's words.

Indra is the first to recover and says, "That's not possible."

"Why did the scout try to take them by force," I ask.

"I don't know Ambassador, I believe the scouts wanted to know where the hunting was good," the guard responds to my question.

"If a true Nightblood had been able to find sufficient shelter to ride out the Deathwave, then in theory they would be able to survive the radation levels," Abby states in answer to Indra's claim that survivors were not possible. It was the first time in a month that Abby had spoken unprompted.

"Does that mean…. I mean would it be possible for… Clarke…" Bellamy starts.

"No," Abby says effectively halting the line of Bellamy's unfinished question, "Excuse me, I will see to the survivor who was injured." And with that Abby gets up and leaves the office without a backwards glance.

"Where is the uninjured survivor?" Octavia asks.

"She is being held by the airlock. She is requesting an audience with you, Heda." The guard says then adds, "Loudly."

"Yes," Octavia prompts when it becomes clear to her that the guard has more he would like to add.

"The one demanding an audience… she is claiming to be Wanheda," He says.

The silence that follows is absolute. No one says a word. Wanheda? It can't be Clarke? Abby wouldn't even entertain the idea a minute ago that Clarke could have survived with the Nightblood solution. Since finding out Clarke wasn't in space with the others; when she does talk about Clarke she talks about her vision when she was affected by ALLIE; she cried the night we found out and talked about how much pain Clarke must have been dying from radation poisoning or worse the Deathwave. Abby had gone on in great scientific detail to how much pan Clarke would have been in; in both scenarios and then she spent hours crying afterwards. There wasn't anything I could say to her to make her feel better so I just held her and rocked her as she cried. But could this survivor be Clarke? Wanheda does just mean Commander of Death; surviving Priamfaya would certainly give anyone the qualifications to become Wanheda.

"Is the one claiming to be Wanheda a woman?" I ask, not sure what to hope for yet. If it is Clarke will Abby be okay that she gave up on Clarke? If it is Clarke and she's basically been alone for six years will she even been the same person? If it is someone else just claiming to be Wanheda, maybe Clarke can have died in peace.

"Yes, Ambassador. They both are," answers the guard and another silence follows almost as quiet as the one before.

"We don't know it is her," Indra cautions the room.

"I want to see her, before I tell Abby about someone claiming to be Wanheda," I say. There is no reason to get her hopes up if one of the survivors is just using Wanheda because she survived Priamfaya without the bunker or going into space.

"Bring me the one claiming to be Wanheda," Octavia commands.

"Yes, Heda," the guard says and turns and leaves the room.

"Ambassadors leave us. If this is Wanheda is Clarke Griffin, Skaikru will want a minute alone," Octavia says and the ambassadors rise and one by one leave the room. Each ambassador passes by me as they leave and they give me a subtle squeeze on the shoulder as a sign of good luck or trying help brace me for the coming disappointment, I'm not sure.

"Could it be Clarke?" Raven asks after the last ambassador has left the room.

"In theory, I don't see why not. If the nightblood solution worked all she would have had to do was make it back to the lab before the Deathwave," Bellamy says.

"She would have only had a few minutes to get to the lab before the Deathwave hit and after we left," Raven says.

"We don't know that it is Clarke," Indra cautions again.

"Do you have something against…" Raven starts heatedly.

"I think Indra just doesn't want us to get our hopes up, in case that it isn't," I interrupt Raven before she can say anything else.

"LET GO OF ME! Madi? What did you do with her? Where is the girl I was with?" a woman shouts outside the office, "She was hurt, let me see her."

"Heda, the woman who says she is Wanheda," the guard must shout to be heard over the woman yelling about her friend. The guard pushes the woman into the room; her head is covered by a bag to keep her unaware of her surroundings and her hands are tied in front of her. The build of the woman looks about right, but the ends of her hair red and Clarke was blonde. I find myself unable to recognize if the voice is Clarke's or not. It's been too long. I look over at Raven and Bellamy; they both have stood straighter; perhaps they recognize her voice.

"Remove the hood," Octavia says and the guard behind the woman takes the hood off.

"Clarke," Bellamy breathes out and he rushes forward to give her a hug, but stops when he remembers that her hands are still bound. He looks over at Octavia; she gives a slight nod and he cuts her free and wraps Clarke into a tight hug. Clarke returns his hug and when Raven moves towards them Clarke gives Raven a hug as well. Maybe the grounders were right; maybe Clarke really is the Commander of Death. Despite all odds she survived Priamfaya. Abby found a cure in the nightblood solution. I step out into the hall and call for Miller as he was on my detail this morning.

"Sir?" he asks.

"Get Dr. Griffin now," I tell him.

"Sir, she is attending to the other survivor," Miller tells me. I nod my head; Abby needs to know Clarke is alive, but she has to be a doctor first.

"Find me as soon as she is done attending to the other survivor," I say.

"Sir? Is it true? Is Clarke alive?" Miller asks as he tries to look around me to see into the office.

"Yes, it's true, but I don't want Dr. Griffi to find out from anyone but me or Clarke, herself, is that understood?" I tell him.

"Yes, sir," and with that he makes his way down to med bay.

I walk back into office and see that Raven and Bellamy still have Clarke in a hug. Clarke finally pulls out of the hug with her friends. She turns to Octavia, "Octavia, tell your guards to release Madi, the girl your scouts brought it with me, she isn't a threat. She means no harm to anyone."

"How did you survive Priamfaya, Clarke?" Octavia asks ignoring Clarke's pleas all together.

"That's not important right now. Octavia, Madi was hurt when the scout took us in by force. She isn't going to attack anyone, please let me see her," Clarke pleads. Who is this girl? Why is Clarke so attached to her, though that is a stupid thought. These two girls were likely the only human interaction either have had for the last six years; of course, they are close. So close, in fact that Clarke hasn't even asked where Abby is.

"Your companion can wait, Clarke, first you need to answer a few questions. First, how did you survive?" Octavia says.

Clarke takes a step towards the desk like she means to sit in the chair across from Octavia, but at the last second pulls Bellamy's knife from his belt and sinks it into the desk inches from Octavia's hand and looks straight at Octavia, "I'll answer our questions after I see Madi, otherwise you can go float yourself."

Indra draws her sword quickly and places up to Clarke's throat, but Octavia signals Indra to do nothing further. Bellamy steps forward, but Octavia slows his progress the same way she slowed Indra's. Clarke's eyes never leave Octavia and vis versa. Clarke wouldn't hurt Octavia, but she is close enough to this girl to attack the Commander of the collation. Something about Clarke's actions seem so familiar; it's not of leader Clarke had grown into, but something else.

"Clarke, maybe you could…" I start to try and de-escalate the situation.

"Quiet Kane," Octavia says, eyes still locked on Clarke's. She waits another minute before speaking again, "Alright, Clarke. Twenty minutes with your friend in med bay then you answer all of my questions."

"I won't leave her alone with people she's never met and two of which came at her with a sword when she refused to leave with them. If you want your questions answered in twenty minutes then you can come down to Medway," Clarke negotiates.

"If she picks up a weapon, my guards will be forced to respond in kind," Octavia says.

Clarke's grip on the knife gets so tight her knuckles turn white, but then she relaxes and let go of the knife and steps back from the desk and responds, "Fine, take me to Madi."

Octavia looks over at Indra for the first time since Clarke picked up the knife, "Indra will escort you down to Med bay."

Clarke nods once and turns towards the door. She waits for Indra to get ahead of her and follows her out without a backwards glance.

"What the hell?" Raven exclaims when Clarke and Indra have left the room.

"You okay, O?" Bellamy asks.

"Yea, Bell. I'm fine. It seems Clarke is very attached to this other survivor," Octavia says.

"Enough to try and kill Octavia," Raven says.

"Nothing about Clarke's actions had any intent to hurt anyone. It was desperation; she cares for this girl," Octavia states.

"If you don't object, Octavia, I would like to follow Indra and Clarke down to Med bay," I say and wait for Octavia to give a nod of approval.

I catch up to Indra and Clarke just as they are approaching Med bay. Through the glass wall I can see Abby is trying to treat a young girl who is sitting on a gurney, but she isn't sitting still enough for Abby to be very affective. Abby is trying to get the girl to let her bandage a nasty slash down her arm. There is a cloth wrapped around her hand that has been soaked in blood. Nightblood.

"Mom," Clarke breaths out. I look over at Clarke; she is just staring at Abby. It looks like after everything that has happened in the last couple of hours Clarke hadn't had time to think about the fact that Abby would be here. Clarke wipes away tears that had formed after seeing Abby. Clarke rushes into Med bay towards Abby and the young nightblood without waiting for Indra or myself, but we follow her into the room. Clarke immediately wraps the young girl in a tight hug and asks the girl something in the grounder language that I can't quite make out.

"How are you, my little nightblood?" Indra translates next to me. The girl yanks her arm from Abby's grasp and wraps her arms tightly around Clarke and buries herself into Clarke's chest. Clarke lets one arm go and grabs hold Abby's hand tightly, but she doesn't release her grip on the young nightblood. Mother and Daughter get their first look at one another in six years. Abby has begun tearing up and Clarke lets the tears in her eyes fall, but neither say anything. For a few long minutes the nightblood holds onto Clarke while Clarke holds Abby's hand. The nightblood girl finally says something; it sounds like it was in response to Clarke's question, but it's too muffled for me to make it out clearly.

"It hurts. Worse than that time I fell from the tree. I thought you said the people in the bunker were your friends why did they attack us?" Indra translates for me again. Indra has been helping me with their language, but I'm not picking up the nuances of the language the same way Octavia, Clarke and even Abby seem to have. Abby began learning the language from their healers and has since become nearly fluent.

Clarke pulls the girl from her chest and leans down to look her in the eyes before speaking this time in English, "They are, little one, they were just scared. Now they are going to patch you up."

The nightblood looks at Abby, "I don't want them to do it, can't you do it?"

"Madi, this is my mom, Abby. She is a good doctor and she isn't going to let anyone hurt you," Clarke says and looks up at Abby for conformation.

When Abby does find her voice she says, "That's right. It's my job to make you feel better."

"Clarke, can't you do it? I don't know these people and they have already attacked us once. What if they are like those people from that ship we saw?" The nightblood, Madi, says. She had spoken in the grounder language and I caught most of what she had said, but the part about a ship Indra had to translate for me.

"Okay. I'll do it, but you need to sit her and keep pressure on the wound, okay. I need to talk to my mom for a minute, okay? I will be right over there." Clarke tells Madi and she points in Indra and my direction.

"Okay," says Madi and she takes a gauze and presses into the sword wound on her arm. Abby and Clarke walk over to where Indra and I had been standing.

Abby finds her voice again, "Clarke?" She turns Clarke to have her face her and she puts her hands on Clarke's cheeks, "is it really you?"

"Yea, Mom, its me. I'm okay," Clarke's voice cracks as she answers Abby and she allows herself to be pulled into a tight hug by Abby. She lets the hug last, but eventually she pulls out of her mother's embrace, her voice still shaky, "is Madi okay? I mean other than the laceration on her arm and hand?"

"Can't I just look at you for a minute," Abby asks.

"Mom. Please, Madi is she okay?" Clarke asks again.

Abby looks at Clarke and over at Madi, who is looking at us, but is doing as Clarke asked and keeping pressure on her wounds. When Abby looks back at Clarke and answers she says, "As far as I can tell she's fine, but she wouldn't let us examine her. She wouldn't say anything or respond to any of our questions in either language. She's been active and responsive, but until a full examine I can't be certain."

"She said she was in pain have you given her anything for it?" Clarke asks.

"No, she wouldn't be still enough for me to give her an injection. She was barely tolerating me cleaning out the laceration on her arm.

"Can you get a pain killer for her? I'll stitch her up now." Clarke asks.

"What ship was she talking about Clarke?" I ask because the girl sounds afraid of whatever this ship is.

Clarke looks up at me; with the fire, I have seen before in Abby's eyes, before she speaks, "Octavia gave me twenty minutes, it has been less than five."

"Clarke…" I try again.

"Kane, she's right," Indra says to me. Clarke takes the pain killer and suture kit that Abby had gotten for Clarke. Clarke takes the medical supplies and walks over to Madi.

Clarke sits down on the chair by the gurney that Madi was on, "Hey, little one. This is going to make you feel better," Clarke says holding up the pain medicine in the syringe up to show Madi.

Madi looks down at the needle before holding out her arm to Clarke, "How does it make it better?"

"Well there medicine it that blocks the pain…" Clarke begins much like a teacher explaining weather changes.

"No lessons, right now," Madi says pleadingly.

"Alright," Clarke laughs, "but you know when I told you about the Commander Lexa's fight with King Roan of Azegeda and I told you that she used her hand to keep the king's sword from killing her it wasn't meant to inspiration in a fight." Clarke picks up Madi's hand and unwraps it to look at the damage on the palm of her hand.

"I know. I know, but what else could I do? They were going to hurt you," Madi responds.

"Hey, it's my job to keep you safe," Clarke says as she rewraps Madi's hand after having put disinfectant on the wound.

"I thought it was our job to look out for each other," Madi says, turning a little to give Clarke a better angle to her arm.

Clarke stops what she is doing and looks Madi in the eyes, "I guess you're right, but please no more grabbing swords, okay?" Clarke says.

Madi ducks her head, "Okay?" Clarke asks again bringing her free hand to Madi's chin to gently force Madi to look her in eyes.

"Okay. How long do we have to stay here? I want to go back to the Rover. It's noisy in here." Madi says and she looks around at the generators that produce noise. I always forget they make noise until someone points it out.

"I'm not sure, but soon. Okay, for now, why don't you lay down and rest." Clarke says once she finishes up with Madi's wounds and she gently pushes Madi down on the gurney and pulls a blanket over her.

"You still going to be here when I wake up?" Madi asks. For the first time since I've been in the Med bay Madi sounds terrified.

"Aren't I always?" Clarke asks rhetorically and fusses with the blanket a little more. Madi closes her eyes and Clarke sits there and watches her sleep.

"It seems Wanheda has developed a strong bond with the natbilda." Indra says. Pulling me away from watch Clarke and Madi interact.

"It reminds me of when Clarke was four and she had a fever and we had used up the limit on drugs to reduce her fever and I just sat with her for hours. Just holding her." Abby says. I remember Clarke getting sick Jake and Abby barely left Medway until the fever broke.

"Gaia broke her arm training when she was a girl and the bone didn't heal properly, the healer had to rebreak the bone, I didn't leave her side for a week," Indra says.

"I don't understand what either of those instances have to do with Clarke and Madi," I say completely lost. Indra doesn't share much about her life as a mother.

"It seems Clarke became a mother in the last six years," Abby says.

"That girl is older than six years old," I say.

"Not every family shares blood," Indra says then adds, "I will tell Octavia that Clarke wishes to stay with the Natbilda until she wakes and that we should prepare for whatever could be on the ship Wanheda and the Natbilda were talking about." With that she turns and leaves the room. Abby steps closer to me and I open my arms and wrap them around her. We just watch Clarke watching Madi sleep. Octavia words in the office before I left finally sink in. Clarke was desperate to get to this girl; it was more aggressive than anything Abby had done to get down here back to Clarke. But on the other hand, Abby did get Raven to build a shuttle from scraps to get them down here. Sinking a knife into a desk next to the hand of the Commander, maybe doing whatever it takes to get back to a loved one is just a Griffin women trait. Octavia would recognize it just as well as Abby and Indra because Bellamy was always just as desperate to keep her safe.

"Marcus?" Abby says after awhile.

"Hmm?" I acknowledge

"She's alive, my baby girl," Abby says.

"Yes, and the two of you will be a family again after the commotion of her return settles down.

"The four of us," Abby corrects.

"The four of us." I correct and kiss the top of her head.

"I just hope that whatever is out there lets us have some time together before… before Clarke takes it upon herself to help everyone." Abby says.

"Me too," I tell her, because I know I can't promise nothing is going to happen because something always does on the ground.

 _Thanks for reading._


	3. Chapter 3

_Unlike the other two works in this series this will be told in Nilyah's POV not Kane's._

 _I drew inspiration for this fic from interviews that had said that for Madi the 100 would be like her heroes and so this is basically her just being excited by the prospect of meeting some of them. And I think she would also be interested to know what Clarke was like before they met._

"Wanheda is alive," an Azegeda warrior says as I look up from my task. I had been hearing the whispers all afternoon, but I hadn't taken it seriously. After Bellamy and the rest returned from the sky without Clarke, Abby had told me she died when Priamfaya had hit. Raven came to see me shortly after their return and told me Clarke had needed to set up a tower so they could take off. I was upset when I heard she had died, but I when I thought about Clarke I always saw how haunted she looked and if she were gone perhaps she found peace in the light of the Commander, perhaps even with Commander Lexa.

But after hearing the rumor from an Azegeda warrior, I must know the truth, "I will be back," I tell a Skiakru worker by my station. I make my way down to the infirmary to see Abby. After the doors shut I began spending time learning from the older Skiakru doctor. I thought the way Clarke healed the wounded was amazing and was happy when Abby had agreed to teach me their ways in healing. Abby is a patient teacher and so knowledgeable, but where Clarke embraced the differences of Trikru, Azegeda and the other clans, Abby still saw danger. She has gotten better over the years, but it has taken the Mother much longer than the Daughter to see the differences as just that. When Abby had learned of Clarke's death, she redoubled her efforts to teach everyone who wanted to learn. It was almost like she was trying to honor the dead by teaching a new generation of healers.

I had intended to stay near the infirmary in case Abby had needed anything, but Octavia wanted me to help dry and preserve the meat the hunters had brought back. It wasn't much meat, but I did as I was told. When I made it to the Infirmary, there was a group of Skiakru standing outside. The group of the Skiakru was left of the group Clarke used to call the 100. I saw Ambassador Kane standing by Indra, I walk over to them, but I see their focus is on something inside the infirmary. I follow their gaze and see, "It's true," I breath out.

Ambassador Kane looks over at me, "Yes, it is."

"I thought survival on the surface was impossible," I say.

"It seems Dr. Griffin's nightblood solution had worked," Indra says.

"How has she survived all these years alone?" I ask. Not because I didn't believe Clarke couldn't have survived on her own; I know she could have she had been intent on doing just that when I first met her.

"We don't know. She has refused to talk to Octavia and she won't leave the Infirmary," Indra says.

"She's hurt, then." I feel a familiar sense of worry I get when I think of Clarke getting hurt. Every time I saw her she always had some new cut somewhere. Clarke was never a warrior, she was always a leader, but a warrior not so much.

"No. She is uninjured." Kane assures me.

"Then she is here to see Abby?" I ask.

"No, the girl with her was injured when some of the hunters ran into them," Kane says.

"Did the hunters hurt the girl?"  
"They are saying the girl appeared from nowhere and they reacted," Indra says. She sounds disgusted by the hunter's version of events. I look back over to where Clarke form is and now I see a girl who looks like she hasn't seen more than twelve summers. The hunters who had gone on the first hunt were expert hunters before Priamfaya and I can't see how a girl of that size would have been able to sneak up on them.

"Niylah!" Octavia calls out.

I make my way over to Octavia and I bow my head when I get to her, "How can I help you, Commander?"

"I would like you to talk to Clarke and have her meet me. She can't keep ignoring me just because the girl was injured." Octavia says.

"I don't think it's Clarke's intention to offend, Commander. She is just worried about her companion," I say.

"Either way the Ambassadors are getting restless because Wanheda survived Priamfaya and now is refusing to tell us where the hunting is good." Octavia says.

"I'll try, but like everyone else I haven't seen Clarke in six years," I tell her.

"Niylah if anyone can make her understand the seriousness it would be you," Octavia says.

I look through the window and really see Clarke for the first time. Her hair is shorter than I remember and it has red in it like it did when she first walked into my father's trading post. Her clothes look closer to that of what my people wear than what her own do. I look back at Octavia and nod my head and walk into the infirmary.

"Ha yun, ai lukot," I say when I get to the bed Clarke and the girl were at. Clarke head snaps up and looks in my direction. I look at the girl and see that she is in fact awake.

"I'll be right over there," Clarke tells the girl and points to a spot a little way from her. The girl nods the acknowledgement. Clarke and I move away from the girl's bed, but Clarke keeps the girl in her eyesight.

"I'm glad you are all right," Clarke says, "I had hoped someone would put your name in the lottery."

I smile at her, because of course Clarke had worried about my safety in the bunker after she left, but I don't correct her on how I ended up in the bunker because it isn't important now.

"How have you been?" Clarke tries.

"Good. Your mother has been teaching the Skaikru healing ways. Under Octavia's rule we have found a peace down here." I tell her.

"I hope it lasts outside the bunker," Clarke remarks, I decide not to say anything because privately I hope it does to, but peace in the bunker has been fragile, to say the least.

"Who is your friend," I ask looking over at the girl and see that the girl is watching us intensely. She has even sat up in her bed.

"Madi. We found each other five years ago," Clarke says and her voice softens.

I decide now is as good as any to tell Clarke of Octavia's wishes, "Octavia would like a word. She is getting impatient and she isn't the only one. The ambassador's have to be able to tell their people something."

"I'm not leaving Madi here. Alone," Clarke declares furiously. I'm taken aback by Clarke's response. It's not that I've never seen Clarke angry, but this seems different. She won't leave Madi here alone. Clarke seems scared almost by the idea of leaving Madi alone.

"Clarke?" Madi calls and Clarke immediately moves to Madi side. I watch the interaction and I've never seen Clarke so soft with anyone. Clarke says something and Madi giggles. Then Madi says something and Clarke turns and looks at me. Clarke tilts her head towards Madi and herself and I walk over to them.

"This is my friend, Niylah," Clarke says.

"The one who helped you after the Mountain?" Madi asks.

"Yes, that's the one," Clarke says.

"It's nice to meet you," I say to Madi. Her eyes are wide and she is smiling brightly. I lean over to Clarke and try again, "you need to talk to Octavia and the council."

"If you have to go talk to someone, Niylah, could stay with me? You always trusted her, Clarke, even when the monster who stole minds came," Madi says.

"Madi…" Clarke starts.

"I'll be okay," Madi says, "Anyways, you have to tell Bellamy and Octavia about the ship we saw."

Clarke thinks for a minute and turns to me, "do you mind staying with her while I am gone?"

"No. I'll stay with Madi, while you are gone."

Clarke looks back at Madi says, "I won't be long, okay?"

"Swega?" Madi asks in my tongue and she holds out her pinky to Clarke for some reason.

"Ai swega em klin," Clarke answers and she hooks her pinky with Madi's then she leans forward and gives Madi a kiss on her forehead. Clarke gets up and before she leaves she looks back at Madi and says, "I'll be back strikon Natblida," and with that Clarke leaves the infirmary.

Madi and I both watch Clarke leave and as she leaves it hits me that Madi is a Natblida, that was how she survived.

We are silent for awhile, but Madi breaks the silence, "Niylah?"

"Yes?" I ask.

"What was Clarke like? I mean I know the stories she has told me, but what was she like before the she fought the Mountainy Men? How did she beat the Mountain? She won't tell me how. Do you know what she was like when she was my age?"

Madi's questions come at me fast. I am at a lost as to which questions to answer. Clearly, Clarke had no desire to tell Madi about how she had killed the Mountain. I know Clarke had never been proud of her actions at Mount Weather and I know when I first met her at my father's trading post she was haunted by her actions. If Clarke hadn't told Madi everything about the Mountain maybe I shouldn't either.

"Niylah?" Madi asks seeing that I wasn't listening anymore.

"How about you tell me the story? I'll add in what I can." I tell her.

"That's what Clarke says when she doesn't want to tell me," Madi pouts.

"Well, I promise to add in what I can, but I didn't know Clarke before the Mountain."

"Okay, but you promise to add something to the story?" Madi asks.

I laugh, "I will do my best." Madi seems to take this answer. I am pleasantly surprised by how innocent Madi seems to be despite what must have brought her to Clarke.

Madi sits up a bit straighter and begins a story she seems to know well, "Once upon a time there was a castle in the sky, and the people who lived there were scared of the ground below, but the castle was dying. So, they decided to send the bad children down to the scary place…" I hear movement behind me and turn and see Abby and Raven coming over to use. Abby puts a finger to her lips signaling me to not draw attention herself or Raven.

I focus my attention back to Madi, "to see if they could survive. In the beginning, there were 100 of them, well Clarke always says there were 101 including Bellamy, but wouldn't it be 102 including Raven?" Madi asks.

I look over at Abby and Raven because this was before I met Clarke. Raven answers, "Well I came down from the Ark…or the castle… after the dropship that had the rest of the 100."

"You're Raven?" Madi asks, clearly awed.

"Uh yea, nice to meet you." Raven says unsure why Madi looks so awed.

"Can you keep telling us the story?" Abby asks.

"Okay, anyway, there was originally 102 of them. And they were all alone. With no parents. So, they did whatever the hell they wanted," Madi says. Raven makes a disguised snorting sound, but Madi was too focused on her storytelling to stop, "Then the monsters came and some of them killed the bad children. Some took the children away to steal their bones. One even stole their minds, but the bad children fought back…." I see Raven and Abby shift uncomfortably at the description of the Trikru warriors, the Mountain Men and Allie.

"… And the bad children realized that together even bad children can do good things. They even began to see that some of the monsters were just like them…" I think that seeing some of the 'monsters' as just like them had something to do with Clarke meeting Lexa.

"…but when the parents came down to find their children, they didn't understand. They just made things worse…" I look over at Abby and see she has tears in her eyes. Raven has put her hand on Abby shoulder and given it a squeeze.

No one stops Madi's story and she continues "…the 100 fought for their land. They fought for their friends. And sometimes they fought against their own families. They tried to be the good guys, but then they realized maybe there are no good guys. And they aren't children anymore, but it didn't matter after all they did to survive it turned out the scary place was haunted by a monster they couldn't kill. So, they found a place that could save them all, but they couldn't figure out how to share, until a hero, Octavia, rose from the ashes to unite them all…"

"Octavia would love to hear that description of her," Raven says.

"Shh." Abby says to her and she turns back to Madi, "Please continue."

"In the end, the unkillable monster came not everyone made it inside. Eight warriors forced to face the monster alone. They fought like they had never fought before, but it wasn't enough until one of the eight the bravest, fairest of them all climbed the highest tower to cast the spell sending her friends back to the sky. Just as the monster roared in, if she had to die to save her friends then she would die…"

"Little egotistical of Clarke, don't you think?" Raven asks.

"Shh." Abby and I say to her.

"But she didn't die because she had magic blood. Only now she was alone; everyone she loved or cared about was gone. Trapped under the ground or lost in the sky. She thought she was the last person on the world, but she was wrong. She found another, the most badass, well second most badass warrior on earth and they lived happily ever after."

"That's an intense story," Abby says.

"Clarke says that if we don't learn about the past we are doomed to repeat it," Madi says, "Clarke tells the stories because the thinks they would be less scary than if she just told them without monsters."  
"She might be right about that," Abby says.

"Niylah how did Clarke become Wanheda?" Madi asks.

"By defeating the mountain?" I answer honestly.

"But how? Even Lexa couldn't beat the mountain and she was the greatest Commander," Madi says.

"She did what she to do to keep her friends and family alive," Abby says.

"Do you think while Clarke and I are here could I meet Bellamy and Octavia? Clarke says they are the reason her people survived the monsters." Madi asks.

"I think we could arrange that," Abby says. Clearly, she is hoping Clarke will be around for awhile.

"How come Clarke trusts you to stay with me, Niylah?" Madi asks.

"I think it's because after the Mountain fell Clarke hadn't become Wanheda yet, and she came into my father's trading post. She came in with this scrawny pheasant barely worth plucking it was so small, but she did learn to hunt. The last time she brought in meat it was a fully-grown panther." I tell Madi.

"Wow. Clarke has been teaching me to hunt. I want to get a panther just like Clarke." Madi says.

"I'm sure you will," Abby says.

"Why would that make Clarke trust you?" Madi asks.

"I was getting to that. After word spread and Clarke had become Wanheda a bounty was placed on her. Everyone wanted Wanheda and bounty hunters were coming into the trading post looking for her. I never said anything. The last time bounty hunters came in, Roan of Azegeda was there and he showed a drawing of Clarke. It wasn't very good, I would say whoever drew it had never actually seen her before. After Roan left, Clarke asked me how long I had known who she was and I told her since that first meeting. She had started dying her hair red, but when she first came in she still had golden hair and she was dressed like Skiakru. I wasn't hard to guess who she was." I say leaving out that Clarke had in fact been taken that night by the bounty hunter who had come for her.

"Clarke!" Madi exclaims and everyone sitting around Madi's bed turn and look at the infirmary doors and sure enough Clarke is standing there with Indra and Kane behind her.

"I told you I wouldn't be gone long," Clarke tells Madi and she moves to sit at the foot of Madi's hospital bed.

"Clarke, Niylah told me you killed a panther," Madi exclaims excited to tell Clarke what she learned.

"I did. Even have the scars to prove it." Clarke confirms.

"Really?" Madi and Abby ask at once. Madi seems in awe of Clarke, but Abby doesn't sound awed just scared that her daughter was in that kind of danger.

"Really, I jumped on the panther from a tree and I missed the heart and it threw me off it. When it came at me I got the heart that time and before the panther died it clawed my back pretty good." Clarke says.

"Did it hurt?" Madi asks.

"A little, but Niylah patched me up and I was as good as new," Clarke tells Madi. I blush at Clarke's words because from what I remember of that night and I didn't do much healing.

"Hey Clarke?" Madi asks.

"Yes, my little Natblida?" Clarke asks.

"Dr. Abby said that we could see Bellamy and Octavia while we are here. Is that true? Can I meet them?" Madi asks clearly excited by the prospect.

Clarke looks over at her mother and then over to Indra and Kane are standing and finally back to Madi, "I guess we could stay one night and if Bellamy and Octavia aren't busy you could meet them."

"I could go with you if you have to meet them again tomorrow. I won't say a word. I promise." Madi begs.

"We will see, but first you have to go to sleep," Clarke says and Madi immediately lays back down on the bed.

"You'll stay with me until I fall asleep? It's so loud in here, Clarke? How can anyone sleep in this place?" Madi asks and she sounds scared.

"I'll be here all night," Clarke promises.

Abby, Raven and I take that as our que to leave and we make our way over to Indra and Kane.

"Check Clarke out being all momma bear with the kid," Raven says once we are out of earshot.

"I had no idea Clarke was so go with children," I say, though I guess there are a great number of things I never knew about Clarke. When she was coming to Father's trading post she was running from her past and when she came back she was so focused on trying to save everyone that getting to know her past never came up.

"She used to volunteer at the Center on the Ark. She was always good with the kids. She told me once that if she failed her qualifying test to be a doctor she wanted to work in the Center." Abby says.

"She really is always trying to save everyone," Raven says. I'm not quite sure what she means by that, but she looks from Abby to Clarke. There must be a story there.

"How did Clarke's meeting with Octavia go?" Abby asks Kane.

"Octavia has allowed Clarke to stay a few nights in exchange of Clarke telling Octavia what she knows of this new ship Clarke saw," Kane said.

"But…" Abby says.

"Wanheda has made her intentions clear. She doesn't wish to stay and risk a Flame Keeper taking the Natblida from her." Indra says. I can't say I blame Clarke for her desire to keep Madi away from the Flame Keepers for as long as possible.

 _As always thank you for reading._


	4. Chapter 4

Told in Abby's point of view

I lean against the door jam and just watch Clarke watching over Madi as she sleeps. It's such a motherly thing to do and it's hard to process with the idea that Clarke has become a mother figure to a twelve-year girl. When I left to get rations for Clarke, Madi and myself to eat; Madi was still up and happily chatting about possibly meeting Bellamy, Raven and Octavia. The way Madi talks about all of them she is in awe of all them. She sees Clarke as the hero Clarke saw Jake and I when she was little. I put the rations on the table next to the door quietly not wanting to disturb Clarke or wake Madi up. The rations aren't much, but Marcus gave up his so that Clarke and Madi could eat something tonight.

"I know you're there, Mom," Clarke says quietly looking over her shoulder at me.

"Sorry, I didn't want to wake her." I say nodding towards Madi. I grab a chair and sit down next to Clarke.

"Yea, she had a long day. Between what happened this morning and meeting everyone, she was pretty tired," Clarke laughs.

"Why can't you and Madi stay longer, Clarke?" I ask again for the hundredth time since Indra and Marcus left.

Clarke turns and looks at me and takes in the meager rations left on the table by the door before she speaks, "we don't belong in this bunker. Under Octavia's rule or anyone else's. Madi and I were just fine; there was no one attacking us. One day around the coalition and Madi ends up in the infirmary with multiple lacerations. Nothing has changed here, at least not much as far as I can tell, different commander, same problems, but if I can keep Madi safe that's all that matters. I don't want this to end up being Madi's new normal. The violence that seems to follow me whenever I am around everyone."

"It could be different this time, Clarke." I say not sure I truly believe that.

"I don't want to pin Madi's future on a maybe. I don't want her having to go through what I have. Or what the Flamekeepers could put her through for being born a Nitblida" Clarke tells me. I am again struck with the reality of Clarke becoming a mother while she was on the surface alone.

Deciding I wouldn't win the fight about Clarke and Madi staying right now; I asked a question I had had since seeing the two of the together, "how did you and Madi meet?"

Clarke looked over at Madi's sleeping form and brushes the hair from Madi's eyes before she answered," I'd been alone for about a year and one day I stumbled across this cave and there was Madi inside. All alone. She was eating berries and had even managed to catch a rabbit and was cooking it over a fire she had made. She had a little knife in her hand couldn't have been bigger than her palm," Clarke chuckles at the memory.

Clarke shifts in her seat and looks over at me fully, "Madi looked at me, not moving. Didn't say anything then she offered the piece of the rabbit she had skewered on her knife. She had only seen six summers at the time."

"So, would that make her about 12, now?" I ask confirming. Remembering that grounders don't track birthday's like we do.

"Yea, about that old. Trikru didn't celebrate birthdays the way we do. They acknowledged when a child sees a summer, not a date." Clarke explained.

I nod having heard that a few times over the last few years, "how did you do it?"

"Do what?" Clarke asks.

"Raise a child. Survive all alone for all these years. The deathwave.? How did you do it?" I ask. The longer I look at Clarke, my little girl, in front of me the more I don't understand how it's possible. Clarke always dealt with the impending doom well. And I know she has always cared about what happened to those around her, but to raise a child? How is it possible Clarke did all of it alone? How did she find food? Even after hearing about the panther she apparently killed when she left after Mount Weather. My baby girl, who had barely been able to cut into flesh during her first surgery when she became a medical apprentice. Somehow that same little girl managed to hunt and kill on her own for six years with no one helping her. My baby girl is a grown woman. I just wish I could understand how that happened without me being there to see it.

"I hadn't planned to survive the Deathwave, not really," Clarke starts honestly, "there was this satellite that needed to be positioned a certain way so that the doors of the ring would open for us. I don't know. I didn't really understand everything Raven was telling me. I just went to do what she told me, because it was the only way to get the rocket off the ground."

I stay silent not wanting to interrupt Clarke's tale, and smile at Clarke's description of Raven's tech talk.

"The satellites controls was at the top of the tower instead of the one on the ground level. I had to be headed back to the lab with ten minutes to spare. We had to leave by then or we all would be stuck. I saw the controls I need were located towards the top of the tower, so I climbed the tower. I managed to get it to the right settings as the timer hit zero. I remember seeing the rocket go up and I just watched it. I looked over in the direction of Polis and I could see the Deathwave coming. It was... massive. It was destroying everything in its path."

"Then I got down from the tower and just ran like hell towards the lab. I didn't know how I would survive if I lived through the Deathwave, but I knew I didn't want to die like that. So, I ran. I made it inside as the Deathwave caught up to the lab. I remember puking up blood and thinking if this was it maybe I could see Lexa again…. Or Dad. Then I passed out."

"Oh. Sweetie... I..." I start. Wishing I could do something more to ease Clarke's pain about losing Lexa. And Jake.

Clarke cut me off, "it's okay, Mom," I look at her and I see that she does look better after mentioning Lexa than she did the last time I saw her. Before the pain was always so clear on her face, but now it's just in her eyes. I guess being alone gave her time to finally grieve.

Clarke continues with her story, "when I woke I was still in the lab. I had puked up a lot of blood before passing out, but I was alive. So, I managed to gather up what was left flood wise and rationed it as best I could. I stayed in the lab for almost a month. By the end of the month I had managed to figure out how to use the half-finished radio Raven left behind. I started calling them every day. I don't know if they ever received them and after awhile I didn't really care. It was just something to keep track of the days. Kept me sane before Madi and I found each other."

My heart is breaking for everything my little girl has gone through since we parted ways six years ago. Really since she was arrested on the Ark, almost eight years ago. My breath catches at realizing it's been eight years since Jake and all of this started.

"Then after the first month I decided it was time to test the nightblood solution. Either way I had to leave the lab. The food was almost gone and if I didn't leave I would die, but if I left maybe I could keep living. So, I left the lab and ventured outside for the first time in a month and it was pure destruction. Then eventually I found Madi and we've been living on the only piece of land we have found not destroyed."

"Clarke, I'm so sorry." I find myself saying knowing it's not nearly enough, but not exactly sure what I was apologizing for.

"It's okay. I've made my peace with what happened. All of it. I saved my friends. I mean I saved who I could." Clarke says and her voice breaks for the first time during her tale. I hug Clarke and keep her in a tight embrace for as long as she lets me. Eventually, Clarke pulls away and wipes her eyes of the tears falling.

"Clarke, please just stay. I can't promise it'll be perfect, but we've been apart for six years and we haven't seen each other or talk. And I would really like to get to know Madi." I say.

"I just don't want the stories I told Madi to become her reality," Clarke explains.

"Yea, Madi told us a story you tell her."

"I heard the end of it. It's one of her favorites."

"It is an intense story..." I say lamely.

"She wanted to know about the past and I didn't know how to explain Mount Weather or Allie without scaring her with how bad it was."

"I didn't know you had such a talent for story-telling."

Clarke laughs softly, "Yea, Madi isn't interested in medicine, so I had to find something else to keep her interested. I'm just glad Lexa had told me stories that she heard as a child it made it easier to keep up with teachings of Trikru. When Madi and I first met those were the stories she wanted to hear; it wasn't until after a year or so that she wanted to hear about the Ark.

After I told her about the Ark and the hundred; she fell in love with the story. Her heroes have been Bellamy, Raven and Octavia since the first time I told her the story." There is a soft knock on the infirmary door and Clarke and I look over at the door and we see Indra and Octavia behind her.

"Sorry to interrupt, Dr. Griffin, but Heda would like a word with Wanheda," Indra says.

"I already told Octavia everything," Clarke says keeping her voice low to not wake Madi.

"Clarke, I need a word, it's important," Octavia says stepping into the infirmary.

Clarke looks over at Madi's sleeping form and back at Octavia, "let's make this fast," Clarke gives Madi a kiss on her forehead and moves towards Octavia.

"Wait here, Indra," Octavia orders. Indra gives a nod of her head to indicate she heard.

The door closes and I can see Octavia and Clarke talking, but with the door closed it is impossible to hear what is being said. I'll give the Second Dawn credit, they really thought out making the infirmary damn near sound proof. It makes it easier when we don't have all the supplies required for surgery. No one needs to hear someone screaming throughout a surgery. After we landed Marcus told me a lot of people got antsy when I operated on Raven.

"Where's Clarke?" comes a sleepy voice behind me.

"She is talking with the Commander," Indra answers.

Madi sits up on the bed and looks at the door and asks excitedly, "is that Octavia?"

"When discussing the Commander, they will be addressed as Commander or Heda, not their name, little one," Indra says firmly, but not unkindly. After being stuck in this bunker for six years with Indra, I no longer find it odd to see her so nice to children. Indra is really quite good with them.

"But Clarke calls her by her name," Madi points out.

"Wanheda, has been away for awhile, perhaps she has forgotten the rules," Indra says.

"I don't think so, Clarke says the best way to discuss issues with anyone is to treat them as an equal. To never show fear," Madi says. I chuckle it sounds a lot like the advice Clarke gave me when I first had to interact with the grounders when I became Chancellor.

"Have you become a leader?" Indra asks.

"No," Madi says looking at her hands.

"Then the Commander is addressed as Commander or Heda," Indra says.

"Does that mean Clarke is a leader?" Madi asks.

"Wanheda, is the mountain slayer and will always have a place within the Coalition. She has also proved her resilience in the face of overwhelming odds." Indra says.

"Does this mean Clarke is gonna have be an Ambassador again?" Madi asks. I'm surprised to hear that she sounds almost disappointed.

"No, sweetie, Marcus is the Skikru ambassador," I tell her. I privately hope I am right. Clarke doesn't want to be here so I hope that means she doesn't find her away back into the position of power she had before the Deathwave hit.

"Okay. Good, because Clarke is supposed to teach me how she killed a panther. And she said we could leave in the morning. I don't like it down here it's always so dark; how can you tell when the sun is up." Madi says. She no longer sounds happy to be here like she did when she was talking to Niylah earlier or when she saw Octavia.

"There are people here who could teach you how to hunt a panther," I say. Hoping that maybe I can get either Clarke or Madi to agree to stay longer than morning.

"I want Clarke to teach me. I don't like it here." Madi responds, "it' always so loud."

"I thought that at first too, little one, the machines never quiet, but that does not mean that this could not be a safe place for you and Wanheda." Indra says.

"No, I don't wanna stay. I don't want to train with the Fleimkepas." Madi says and now she sounds downright terrified, "Nomon, said they are no more than priest that come in the night to steal the Natblida so that they may do the Fleimkepa's bidding."

At Madi's words, Indra looks over her shoulder and for the first time I notice Gia outside with Clarke and Octavia. "Indra, can I have a word with you over here, please," I ask gesturing to my desk in the corner. Hoping it will be out of earshot of Madi. When we make it to my desk I lower my voice and ask, "you and Octavia aren't planning on ripping that girl from Clarke because she is a nightblood are you?"

Indra looks at me steadily before answering, "I have no intention of taking Madi from Clarke's care, but you must understand our traditions demand that the Natblida train with the Fleimkepas. It is our way."

I look at her and over at Madi who is still staring out the window were Clarke and Octavia are still talking, "maybe Clarke is right, maybe nothing has changed."

Thanks for reading. Comments are ego boosters!


	5. Chapter 5

This is in Bellamy's POV

After six years of thinking Clarke was dead; now she is back, and she has a little kid with her. How had she survived the Deathwave? After her return, Raven and Dr. Griffin had both speculated that as long as Clarke stayed indoors until the worst of the Deathwave had passed, she would be fine due to the Nightblood solution working. That doesn't explain how the kid is alive though.

After talking with Octavia about the visitors that came down just before we did. Octavia was livid that Clarke wouldn't tell anyone where she had been staying for the last six years, but in the end Octavia honored her agreement with Clarke and allowed her to return to the young girl's side. I tried to get Octavia to allow Clarke to stay, but she said that Clarke was insistent that she and the girl would both be gone in the morning and Octavia wouldn't force her to stay because she didn't want to add another person to feed. I had made my way to the infirmary after dinner with Octavia and have just be staring at Clarke watching the girl sleep since I got up here. Occasionally Clarke fusses with the girl's hair or the blanket or something just to keep her hands busy.

"If you want to talk to Clarke, you are going to have to go in there," Echo says from behind

"And say what?" I ask still watching Clarke with the little girl.

"That you missed her, and you did as she asked," Echo prompts.

"She's leaving," I tell Echo.

"I heard," Echo admits.

"Kane said that Clarke doesn't want to stay because of the girl," I tell her.

"I heard that too, Bellamy, I can understand her concern. The girl is a Nitblida, a real one. I'm not saying Ocatvia would do anything, but any true Nitblida would be a threat to her rule. Even if everyone willing to continue to follow a red blood when there is a true Nitblida; the Flamekeepers could want to raise her, turn her into a someone worthy of the blood." Echo tells me. I look over at Echo and I want to argue that Octavia would never do anything to harm a child simply because of her blood, but the truth I'm not sure what will happen. Six years is a long time and Octavia has hinted not all of it was good. Or easy to make the clans fall in line.

"We could keep her safe," I say believing that we could do that if Clarke gave us a chance. Echo looks doubtful, but doesn't say anything instead she leans up and gives me a kiss on the cheek before walking away, probably to have dinner with Murphy and Emori. I turn back to look at Clarke again and finally work up the nerve to walk inside the infirmary door.

"I'm glad you finally came inside," Clarke says softly when I walk up next to her.

"Yea, it's been a lot to process," I tell her.

"Shh. I don't want to wake them," Clarke says softly. Nodding towards Abby who was asleep in a cot nearby.

"You're really going to leave in the morning?" I ask quietly.

"Yes." Clarke answers simply.

"We could keep…." I stop realizing I haven't heard what the Nightblood girl's name is.

"Madi." Clarke supplies.

"Madi," I repeat and then continue, "we could protect her. Keep her safe."

"Bellamy, I don't want her just to be safe. Madi can take care of herself, I made sure of that." Clarke says firmly.

"Then what? I'm sure we could do whatever you want for Madi if you stayed here with your people." I say quietly hoping whatever Clarke needs is something those of us who were in the ring or Abby could easily get in order to keep Clarke here.

Clarke is quiet for so long I am about to prompt her for an answer when she finally speaks, "Do you remember when you first landed? The first time?"

"Yea," I answer hesitantly not sure where she is going with this.

"Do you remember how we kept catching Octavia leaving camp to go see those radioactive butterflies in that clearing? The ones that glowed in the dark?" Clarke asks.

"Yea," I chuckle it seems like a lifetime ago.

"Do you honestly believe that Octavia would or could enjoy that clearing of butterflies the same way now?" Clarke asks me.

I smile at the memory of how excited Octavia was after finding that clearing and I even chuckle about having to go get her from the clearing more than once because it was too dark for her to be outside camp. My smile fades just as quickly when I answer, "no, not really."

"I'm not worried that I can't keep her safe here, I can and will. I'm worried she'll have to become who she has to in order to survive."

I stay quiet because I don't know how to make her fears go away. I know that Dr. Griffin and those of us from the ring would do what it took to keep the daughter of Clarke Griffin safe if that was all she wanted from us, but we can't keep Madi from becoming who she must to survive. Not if the other group of people intend to fight for sole use of the resources. The news Octavia's scouts have brought back and Clarke's description of the people who landed we will have to gear up for another fight soon.

"I missed all of you." Clarke tells me, "I would use the radio Raven left to try to talk to you guys every day. I hoped you guys had made it to the Ring, but then you didn't come down after five years… it had become a ritual I couldn't break. I couldn't get give up on you."

"We never stopped thinking about you, either. You saved us." I told her.

"Raven saved you guys. All I did was move a satellite dish." Clarke corrects.

"Where would we be without Raven?" I wonder out loud.

"Dead. Several times over." Clarke answers. I nod in agreement.

"Raven came up with how to make your insane plans work. Then up in the ring she had to make my crazy plans work. I have a new respect for how you came up with your plans to keep us alive." I tell her. We all agreed when and for how long we had to limit our oxygen when the machine was acting up, but still coming up with what needed to be done was hard. I'm glad Raven was helping me lead up there, I wouldn't have been able to do with without her or Clarke when we were on the ground before.

"Bellamy, I can' stay." She tells me again.

"You won't help your people?" I hear the accusation in my voice for the first time since talking to Clarke.

"Madi is my people." Clarke says firmly leaving no room for argument on that point.

"What about the rest of us?"

"If I stay and help take on these new skaikru people and give Octavia the coordinates then there still won't be enough resources for all of us. Then what? Huh? Another lottery. Another list with a hundred names? I don't want that to be her reality. Do you even remember what it was like on the Ark? Who we were before? I can't let that become her reality, Bellamy, I can't. If I stay it will become her reality. I just want to keep her safe." Clarke is pleading with me to understand.

I think back to Octavia laughter in our quarters when it was just her, Mom and me. Then on the ground how happy she was when she found those butterflies and even when she was acting a little boy-crazy. That seems like a lifetime ago. I look down at the girl on the bed between us and Clarke is probably right. This might become Madi's new reality, but if I had been able to keep Octavia out of all of this I would have done it. I couldn't, but maybe Clarke can.

"I understand, Clarke," I finally tell her, because I really do.

"Thank you, Bellamy."

"I would have done anything to keep Octavia safe and out of this, but I couldn't. I understand wanting to keep her out of this. I really do, but I think it's a mistake, we should stay together and fight. Or negotiate. Whichever. There has to be a way to survive peacefully with the people in the bunker and whoever just landed."

"There aren't enough resources in the valley."

"Then we will figure something out."

"Bellamy, there is no figuring this out. There aren't enough resources in the valley and I won't let Madi grow up without the basic resources needed to survive. There isn't anything we can do." Clarke says. I'm shocked to hear Clarke speaking this way.

"I'm going to figure this out, I promise." I tell her.

"I don't think you can, Bellamy," she tells me sadly.

"No matter what happens next, I am going to do everything I can to keep her safe," I tell her motioning towards Madi on the gurney.

"Bellamy," Clarke starts.

"You saved us, this time its our turn." I tell her. We sit in silence, I suppose there isn't anything left to say because I am sure that Clarke standing by her decision to not fight except to keep Madi safe wont change. Clarke always could stick by her decisions no matter how unpopular they were to the rest of us.


End file.
